This is not to say that there will be any shortage of Caprice's golden-blonde locks and well-toned torso since she will be gracing the cover of the March issue of Playboy, slated to hit the stands February 8, 2000. Caprice, who has appeared in just about every European magazine, with the exception of Nannies Weekly and the Vatican Digest, is understandably delighted with the prospect of appearing in the American publication. "It's a dream come true. I am proud and thrilled to be a part of the history and legend of Hugh Hefner and Playboy," she says. We are relatively proud too and, needless to say, pretty damn thrilled to see some new Caprice artwork arriving on the scene.

According to her publicist, the feature, which was shot on location in London and Puerto Rico, shows Caprice in a swimsuit comprised of former Playboy covers. We, of course, assume that the cute little outfit comes off by the end of the pictorial, otherwise Hef and friends will have a few unhappy subscribers on their hands.

Caprice, 29, was raised in Hacienda Heights, California. At age 18, she moved to New York and began modeling for Estee Lauder and Bonjour jeans, pulling in around $5,000 a day. In 1995, she landed a part in the British sitcom "Filthy Rich and Catflap." Her success has since continued and she has currently managed to accumulate the net worth of every small country in South America and Western Europe combined. As an aside, Caprice's breasts are rumored to be insured for 50,000 pounds ($80,000), which actually is a paltry sum when you consider the asking price of Jennifer Lopez's hind quarters – a cool one-billion dollars. (Are these premiums calculated on size, shape or combination of the two? I guest only their insurance agents know for sure.)

In the Playboy article, Caprice fills in the spaces between her pictures by discussing her forthcoming CD. "The album is about painful relationships," she says. "We've all been dumped and hurt or had to break up with someone." Of course, the fellow who dumped Caprice is most likely in a padded cell somewhere writing his memoirs with wax crayons. We can only hope he has ready access to a local newsstand. What's life without a few photos to back up those fond memories?