While attending the 1999 Warped Tour, Peter Bernard and Vanessa Daughter of Satan came up with the no-less-than brilliant idea of conducting a brief but infinitely priceless survey with some of the event’s performers. The conclusions of their in-depth research follow.

While music and culture are definitely important topics, Vanessa and I couldn't wait to get down to the most popular subject in humanity's history: Sex. We wanted to know how old our favorite rock stars were when they lost their virginity. Here's the breakdown of those willing to answer our query:

Bouncing Souls:
Pete Steinkopf (guitars): "Fourteen... I kinda wish I had waited."
Shal Khichi (drums): "Seventeen."

Agnostic Front:
Roger Miret (lead vocals): "Nine (she was twelve). I didn't know what I was doin'. I wasn't no pro, you know!"

Suicidal Tendencies:
Mike Muir (lead vocals): "Uhhhh, fourteen."

Lunachicks:
Gina (lead guitar): "I was fourteen! Too young. Too young!"
Theo (lead vocals): "I was fourteen also."
Chip (drums): "I was old; I was like eighteen or something."

According to this (admittedly unscientific) poll, the average age that rock stars first get laid is 14.28, almost three years younger than the national norm. I hereby suggest that someone do a real study of this matter. I know I'd buy THAT book when it was released; wouldn't you?

• More Coverage of the Vans Warped Tour 1999 (including photos)

July 1999