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Stern, Freshly Painted,
Jones Beach Theater, 6/11/99
photo © 1999 NY Rock
Howard Stern and Company at K-Rock's Third Annual Dysfunctional Family Picnic by Cook Young
Dressed in a svelte-looking, black ten-gallon hat that had him looking like one hell of a cool Jewish cowboy, Howard Stern joined Rob Zombie onstage roughly midway through the singer's set for a rabble-rousing rendition of "Dragula." Howard's no Pavarotti, of course, but his mere presence at K-Rock's Third Annual Dysfunctional Family Picnic, held at the Jones Beach Theater on June 11th, was enough to elevate the crowd to a lofty height. Joining in mostly on the song's choruses, it was obvious that Stern was having a blast. Need I say it was contagious.

Ivy Supersonic dancers,
Jones Beach Theater, 6/11/99
photo © 1999 NY Rock
 
Zombie – who bounced across the stage demonically, causing his three-foot long dreadlocks to swirl about in the most surreal of fashions – was clearly the highlight of the event. Although the all-day affair is simply one of the best shows in and around town, this year's K-Rock extravaganza was not without its setbacks. For one thing, Scott Weiland and the recently resurrected Stone Temple Pilots were a no show – in addition to Courtney Love and Hole (which, come to think of it, may not have been that bad of a turn of events). A last minute attempt to recruit Ozzy Osbourne was also unsuccessful.

 
Zombie and Stern,
Jones Beach Theater, 6/11/99
photo © 1999 K-Rock
Furthermore, the Ivy Supersonic dancers – a troupe of mostly naked, painted ladies – were temporarily barred from taking the stage. Fred Norris, who opened the Picnic with his trio-extraordinaire King Norris, explained that the State – the ultimate party-poopers that they are – quoted government regulations that prevented, or at least delayed, the dancers appearance before the public. (The girls eventually performed during Limp Bizkit's set, the final event of the evening.) Fortunately, it did not prevent the painted women from mingling backstage where they looked positively lovely, if not a tad bit cold.

Zack De La Rocha of Rage Against the Machine
Jones Beach Theater, 6/11/99
photo © 1999 NY Rock
 
Stern, who adorned a paint job of his own (apparently, to complement Rob Zombie's natural gray pallor during Howard's appearance onstage), was in typically good spirits, mingling with various press hounds and performers backstage. Stern's mood was indicative of the collective frame of mind, as the packed house roared their approval throughout the evening. In addition to Zombie, the Dysfunctional Family picnic offered a string of performers that included Rage Against the Machine, the Lo-Fidelity Allstars, Blink 182, Stuttering John, Kid Rock, the aforementioned King Norris Band and Limp Bizkit – not too shabby a lineup to behold on a perfectly cool June night.


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More Howard Stern and Company:
- On Marriage and, Ultimately, Howard Stern
- K-Rock Dysfunctional Family Picnic II
- Howard Stern Is My Shepherd, I Shall Not Fart
- Fred Norris's band: King Norris

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