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© 2005 Dr. Dot, NY Rock
Dr. Dot (a nickname given by Frank Zappa in 1988) has tended to the musical elite for nearly two decades. She describes
herself as a "rock chick" who, as a teenager, wanted to meet her musical heroes without trading sexual favors. Instead, Dr.
Dot offered massages, which she had been perfecting since she was five years old. Clients have included Sting, Eminem, the Rolling
Stones, Sheryl Crow, Robert Plant, Kiss, Aerosmith, Blondie, Backstreet Boys, N'Sync, Vin Diesel, R. Kelly and Bruce Willis.
She recently completed her first American book, "Butt-Naked and Backstage: Diary of the World's Greatest Rock and Roll
Masseuse."
Submit a question to Dr. Dot
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So many people write and ask, "How can I keep the passion, you know, keep it HOT!?" So this round of Dear Dr.
Dot may be a tad different... but oh so tasty.
The following are 10 tips for women and men -- how to keep it HOT between one another:
10 tips for WOMEN:
1. Make distance. If you live together, get very busy. Absence makes
the heart grow fonder, and if you see each other too much, sex and love will get boring and tedious. If you don't
live together, only meet 2 or at the most 3 times a week and TRY to limit sex to 2 times a week, so it will be
WILD-hungry-SEX. Even if he begs for it, only give it to him 2 times a week. Like they say, a half-fed dog is best behaved.
And people want what they can't have!
2. Give him compliments. Men also need compliments, this will make him feel
good, and treat you better. Tell him how big his balls are, and how crazy
you are about his penis.
3. Phone sex! Even if you live together, when HE calls YOU (don't call him
MUCH; men hate to be chased!), do your normal chat, then tell him what you want to do to him next time you get intimate -- make a
hot fantasy for him to look forward to. Tell him on the phone that you are naked, or playing with yourself. Make him wild for
you.
4. ORAL SEX! Men LOVE blow jobs. If you feel your sex life getting boring, suck on him and lick him, that should shake things
up again. No sex life can be boring if there is enough oral sex going around. Men NEED blow jobs!
5. PORNO. Men love to watch porn. If you won't watch with him, he will do it alone! If YOU suggest, "hey honey, wanna rent a
porno tonight?" he will go crazy! Then you two can get really naughty together. Just make sure it isn't every time you are
intimate together or this, too, will get boring.
6. NEW underwear. It doesn't have to be expensive. Men don't give a shit
about the price or quality, they just LOVE the "new wrapping paper" on their
favorite present (your pussy). Go crazy with colored underwear. Buy blue
stockings with a pink garter belt, and then wear a yellow bra. It's exciting
and shows you are into fantasy; something men live for! (Most men cheat, out of boredom, so keep him guessing -- what will
she have on next? And he may stick around!) Save any ugly underwear for "period days" or when you know 100% you won't see him!
7. HUMOR -- Men really really love a woman who likes to laugh. It's important, so try to cheer up and be a good sport! Make
sex fun, don't be
too serious. Please, remember, men are not as verbal as us gals, so don't TALK so much. So, keep it simple and fun! Save all
that chatter for
your girlfriends. (Note: Men tell me everyday how much they hate chatty girls.)
8. Adventure. Why have sex only at your place or his place? We only live
once, so drag him into a sex shop that has those wank booths, and do it in one while watching a porno; or do it in the
forest, or elevator, etc. Men need adventure; the risk of getting caught will spice things up. If you are too scared to do
it in public, then do it on the kitchen table, or balcony, anywhere but in the bedroom all the time.
9. Massage! Give him a shoulder and back massage, he will melt for you, low lights, warm oil, sexy music.
(Try Billie Holiday, Portishead or Jimi Hendrix for your wild side.) And take a lot of time to spoil his whole body, this
should turn him on big time. (By the way, let him initiate the sex most of the time. Men like to be the hunter.)
10. Strip for him. Even if you are shy, men love to see your whole body (perfect or not) and a sexy dance JUST for him. You
don't have to announce, "Tonight I will strip for you!", just come into the room where he
is, and slowly dance and take off one piece of clothing at a time, and DON'T
let him touch you, just tell him to relax and watch (he can touch himself, but NOT you). He will go crazy!
And you can massage yourself while dancing, in a very sexy way. Remember, it's ALL visual for men!! LET THEM WATCH!
For men:
1. Men cuddle to FUCK, and women FUCK to cuddle. If you remember this, then you will understand women a little better.
They enjoy kissing; hugging and they need you to listen to them. If you want hot sex, you have to handle them right.
Most women don't want to just rush to the sex part; they require a lot of foreplay, which means a lot of kissing and
fondling. If you are too impatient for this, then wank before you meet up with them.
2. Approach with confidence: If you want your girl to do something for you in bed, ask or tell her with confidence.
Example: "Uh, honey, would you please lick my balls? I have always wanted to try this." Her answer would surely be,
"Excuse me? Lick your OWN balls!" (Chris Rock said it best). Your woman is probably naughtier than you can imagine,
she just needs you to bring it out of her and that won't happen if you act wimpy. However, suggest it in a confident tone,
like this: "it would make me so fucking horney if you licked my balls," then it would go over with a bang. Try it and see if
you don't believe me. Make sure you throw in compliments to keep her confidence up too. "You look SO sexy with my balls in
your mouth babe!" You get the picture.
3. Distance. Like I said to the women, it's NOT good to see each other every day, or have sex too often!
That's what your hands are for. If you have sex too often, it will get boring, better to wait until you are both
starving for each other, then it will feel amazing! If you are extremely horney and can't wait, then have telephone sex
with her and wank.
4. Foot massage. YES, this is how foreplay for women should start! If you
rub a woman's feet for a good 20 minutes, it will relax her and make her
want to return the pleasure. It takes women a long time to "shut off"
their daily stress, and STOP worrying about bills, how she looks, house
cleaning, etc. During a foot massage, she will have time to shut off and
just enjoy the physical act. This really works. Try it.
5. Oral sex; like Lil' Kim sings, "if you ain't lickin' it, you ain't
stickin' it!" Women want oral sex too! They like it just as much as
you guys do. If you do it right, and she cums, then you will have amazing sex after!
6. Romance. Bring her flowers, or write her a love note. Bring her to dinner and tell her how beautiful she looks. This is
why Latin men are so successful with getting laid, because they understand what women want. They throw away any pride and
just tell the woman how incredible she is, how nice she smells, how good she tastes. Women love romantic movies and songs,
because they yearn to be loved; they want to be adored like the chick in the film.
7. Cook for her, or help around the house. It's no wonder during a
relationship that the woman loses her sex drive if she has to be YOUR MAID! After she has cooked, cleaned and all of that
other shit around the house, it's almost impossible to just turn into the sexy diva for you! BUT if you help out,
either cooking for her or doing some house work, she will feel grateful and want to reward you with some hot sex;
really, it works! If women do this all on their own, they grow to resent the man and punish him by withholding pussy!!
(Even more so when there are kids involved).
8. Explain to her that sometimes you just want a quickie. Women don't
orgasm as fast as men do, so they don't need quickies like men
do. SO, if you want a quickie, the woman could feel used and be sad. But if you explain that sometimes you just need a quickie,
and you want it to be
with her, and not your hand or anyone else, she should go along with this
AS LONG as you alternate quickies with long love making sessions. No woman should tolerate just quickies, but if you rotate,
one night long love making then one night a hot quickie, in the shower for example, everything should go fine!
9. Trips. If you are in a steady relationship, you should try to go away once in a while to liven things up. Go camping, or
if you can't leave the town, rent a room and meet there at separate times, like you are having an affair. Just go away
together to "leave it all behind" so she can stop stressing and let loose.
10. Role playing. Most women are too shy to mention such crazy ideas -- but if you, the guy, mention,
"let's pretend we are strangers," or, "I am the sick patient, you are my nurse," she might go along with it. But most chicks, not all, are too afraid to whip up a fantasy because they think YOU might think they are
too dirty or laugh at the idea or what have you. Act
out a scene from a movie like in 9-1/2 Weeks; you get my drift.
April 2005
Submit a question to Dr. Dot
Want more Dr. Dot? (And who wouldn't?) Check out her blog at: http://drdot.blog-city.com
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